Random Thoughts

Day 18

Lack of inspiration sucks.

Before, I used to write about my own messed up head.  Now...  I'm not so messed up anymore, so there's not very much to tell about me anymore.  Sometimes, though, I still feel lost, but lost in different ways than I felt before.  Right now, the biggest way I feel lost is spiritually.  Not many folks can relate to my path, so I just keep it to myself.

Sometimes, I find myself wanting to write about other people's messed up heads.  Then I just don't.  For myriad reasons.  I guess because, on some level, I can relate to where they're coming from.  Plus, I learned a long time ago; it never pays to spill the beans for how it's all going to turn out.  Nobody ever believes you when you tell them, and they usually go out of their way to prove you wrong, and that process takes a lot longer to play out than it would have normally... and guess who still was right?  Yep.  Besides...  a lesson sticks better when you learn it on your own, when you earn it.  Now I get why nobody ever handed it over to me.

Sure... some people never seem to learn, and, yeah, sometimes I want to grab them by the shoulders and ask them if they're nuts.  But I've gotten better about not doing that too.  Part of me feels like I just don't care anymore, though, because I'm not saying things people really need to hear.

Then, there's this lack of inspiration thing...  and there goes one thing I really enjoyed doing and had a knack for doing.