Down 66 pounds... still.
I guess my body is catching up from last month's 3 weeks of near starvation. I don't think I'm eating any differently, and I've gone back to the gym. Why isn't that scale budging? I really wish they'd just taken my gallbladder out when they did my bypass. I need to slow my mind down and just look at this like any other plateau. This, too, shall pass.
It's almost time to go buy new clothes. I'm excited that I "get to", but I'm ambivalent because I really don't know what's out there now. That, and ... hey ... I've always been oddly proportioned. That hasn't changed even though I've lost the equivalent of a 7 year old. I'm still thick around the middle and will have a muffin top forever or... until I get my tummy tuck. I guess I'm afraid that newer, smaller clothes are just going to make me feel huge again. It's a mind fuck of sorts. Smaller clothes making me feel huge. Hopefully, someone, somewhere, understands. Maybe I'll end up looking in a mirror and feeling like a jackass for saying that.
In order to realize that I'm not fucking up big time, I have decided to log my food and exercise through myfitnesspal for a few days. Then, I'll know if I'm really doing what the doctor ordered or if I'm screwing myself all to hell and back. I guess we shall see!!
I cleared my closets out. I pulled out about 15 pair of pants/capris that are too big for me.
That's about it for today.
Monday, April 20, 2015
Sunday, April 12, 2015
Week 19
Down 66 pounds.
I wish, when the nutritionist handed me a list of new things I can eat at my last check up, that popcorn had never been on the list. Here I am trying to break another addiction. Yeah... it's the least of evils because it's minimal calories, and I do get the "light" kind, but... It's yet another thing I mindlessly shove in my mouth. I could be using my meal opportunities to get real nutrition.
I'm pretty sure I'm fully recovered from my gallbladder surgery. Nothing hurts, so I went to the gym yesterday. I was pretty impressed with myself. I went a whole 30 minutes on the elliptical after not having worked out for almost 2 months. I figured I'd be missing out on all the progress I'd made. I guess not.
This month is my 5 month surgery anniversary. Next month, I get to have steak. I'm soooo excited. Michael and I have decided that's what we'll have for our anniversary dinner.
I've been slacking because there's really not much to say anymore.
I have good days and bad days. I have days where, even though I can now wear the smallest clothes in my closet, I know that, unless you knew me before, if you looked at me, you'd still see a fat girl. I have days where none of that matters and all I can see is a girl who is getting where she needs to be and is proud of herself. The difference in those days? I blame hormones.
I wish, when the nutritionist handed me a list of new things I can eat at my last check up, that popcorn had never been on the list. Here I am trying to break another addiction. Yeah... it's the least of evils because it's minimal calories, and I do get the "light" kind, but... It's yet another thing I mindlessly shove in my mouth. I could be using my meal opportunities to get real nutrition.
I'm pretty sure I'm fully recovered from my gallbladder surgery. Nothing hurts, so I went to the gym yesterday. I was pretty impressed with myself. I went a whole 30 minutes on the elliptical after not having worked out for almost 2 months. I figured I'd be missing out on all the progress I'd made. I guess not.
This month is my 5 month surgery anniversary. Next month, I get to have steak. I'm soooo excited. Michael and I have decided that's what we'll have for our anniversary dinner.
I've been slacking because there's really not much to say anymore.
I have good days and bad days. I have days where, even though I can now wear the smallest clothes in my closet, I know that, unless you knew me before, if you looked at me, you'd still see a fat girl. I have days where none of that matters and all I can see is a girl who is getting where she needs to be and is proud of herself. The difference in those days? I blame hormones.
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