Down 48 pounds. Woot!!
In 2 days, it will be my 3 month anniversary for my surgery. I'm still soooo happy I did it. I'm happy with my results and, if I needed to, I'd do it all over again in a heart beat.
Yesterday, before I got in the shower, I took my clothes off and forced myself to look in the mirror. I'm glad I did. I could see even bigger changes in some areas and how they're... get this... SHRINKING!!! I think I'm going to make a monthly habit of taking an honest look at my naked self.
Next week, I have my 3 month follow up appointment with Dr. Dan. I still have to go get my blood work done. Nothing like cutting it down to the last minute.
I took last week off from the exercise thing. I had to acknowledge that I genuinely strained my quadricep, and I had to allow time for it to heal. It feels better now, so it's time to get back in the game. We got an elliptical at home, so I spent some time on that. WOW. This elliptical is harder to pedal than the ones at the gym, so it's going to take time for me to build endurance on it. I'm ashamed to say I only got 8 minutes on it. Oh well... that's better than I did last week. I also got my balance ball and dvds for it in the mail on Saturday. I should be good with the variety in workouts. For now.
Monday, February 23, 2015
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Week 12
Down 46 pounds and getting very close to the big 5-0.
It's hard to believe I gained that much weight in just 2 year's time. WOW. Yes... 50 pounds in 2 years. On one hand, it's easy to see how it happened... We didn't exactly deny ourselves and/or practice moderation in any way. On the other... it seems like quite a lot. Ah well... it's going away.
This week, I treated myself to a couple pair of pants. I'm not going hog wild with the shopping, just yet, but I saw them, liked them, and made them mine. I thought, at first, I may have to hold on to them for a bit before they'd fit me, but, when I tried them on... well... they're perfect. It'll be nice to have some work pants that I'm not constantly tugging up.
After we got our furnace situation under control yesterday, we went to the gym. Michael got himself a membership, and he, Tony, and I went to work out. I did some ab exercises that I'm pretty sure I will feel later on today. I already kind of do.
One thing I've noticed with my workouts is that it seems like my right side always does more than my left. I get these silly images of me being all bulked up and buff on one side and all scrawny on the other side. I have to figure out how to compensate for that and make my non-dominant side work as hard.
Tonight, there's a support group meeting that I'm looking forward to. We're supposed to learn about meditation and some chair yoga stuff. Everyone knows I love me some yoga!!
This week, I made some stif fry (minus the rice) with some shrimp and some very tiny pieces of beef that were about the consistency of hamburger. OMG it was soooo good, and it didn't bother my stomach at all. I think, when I had the hamburger before, it was the cheese that bothered me. I still can't wait until May when I can eat some steak, though.
It's hard to believe I gained that much weight in just 2 year's time. WOW. Yes... 50 pounds in 2 years. On one hand, it's easy to see how it happened... We didn't exactly deny ourselves and/or practice moderation in any way. On the other... it seems like quite a lot. Ah well... it's going away.
This week, I treated myself to a couple pair of pants. I'm not going hog wild with the shopping, just yet, but I saw them, liked them, and made them mine. I thought, at first, I may have to hold on to them for a bit before they'd fit me, but, when I tried them on... well... they're perfect. It'll be nice to have some work pants that I'm not constantly tugging up.
After we got our furnace situation under control yesterday, we went to the gym. Michael got himself a membership, and he, Tony, and I went to work out. I did some ab exercises that I'm pretty sure I will feel later on today. I already kind of do.
One thing I've noticed with my workouts is that it seems like my right side always does more than my left. I get these silly images of me being all bulked up and buff on one side and all scrawny on the other side. I have to figure out how to compensate for that and make my non-dominant side work as hard.
Tonight, there's a support group meeting that I'm looking forward to. We're supposed to learn about meditation and some chair yoga stuff. Everyone knows I love me some yoga!!
This week, I made some stif fry (minus the rice) with some shrimp and some very tiny pieces of beef that were about the consistency of hamburger. OMG it was soooo good, and it didn't bother my stomach at all. I think, when I had the hamburger before, it was the cheese that bothered me. I still can't wait until May when I can eat some steak, though.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
Week 11
Sunday, I was down 44 pounds. Today, my scale says I'm only down 41 pounds.
On the infamous September 11th, I went on my first "successful" diet. I did Adkins and worked out at the YMCA for about 2 years straight. After a certain point, it got to where I thought it would be okay to have a Dr. Pepper or just a little macaroni and cheese... eww. I have to do my best to remember that it is never okay to go back there because, with me, "a little" becomes "a lot." Anyhow, I bring that up because I'm currently about 20 pounds away from my smallest point back then, and I'm also about 8 pounds away from where I was when I met my boyfriend. This is when I start feeling happy and excited about my progress. Now I remember what it feels like to be a little satisfied with myself, and that keeps getting better and better.
This week, I added weight bearing exercise to my routine. I have this friend at work who has just done amazing things for herself in what seems like a very short time. Granted, she didn't have nearly as far to go as I did/do, but she looks awesome, so I asked her to come to the gym with me and show me a thing or two with the weights. We decided to focus on lower body stuff because... hey... I've always wanted a nice ass. haha. Yesterday and today, I have felt the excruciating pain that comes with trying to keep up with a 24 year old girl. She showed me how to do lunges, squats, and a few other things that will both work my legs out and develop that sweet derriere I've been wanting. Afterwards, though, I could barely walk. It was much the same yesterday, and I still went back to the gym for an upper body workout. Today, I decided to take it easy.
Still not being very adventurous with the food. I did switch over to the Dannon Light & Fit Greek yogurt. It has more protein and tastes way better than the other kind I was eating. Right now, I'm looking forward to May, when I can have a nice, juicy, rare, tiny steak. My love and I have decided we will have it for our anniversary.
On the infamous September 11th, I went on my first "successful" diet. I did Adkins and worked out at the YMCA for about 2 years straight. After a certain point, it got to where I thought it would be okay to have a Dr. Pepper or just a little macaroni and cheese... eww. I have to do my best to remember that it is never okay to go back there because, with me, "a little" becomes "a lot." Anyhow, I bring that up because I'm currently about 20 pounds away from my smallest point back then, and I'm also about 8 pounds away from where I was when I met my boyfriend. This is when I start feeling happy and excited about my progress. Now I remember what it feels like to be a little satisfied with myself, and that keeps getting better and better.
This week, I added weight bearing exercise to my routine. I have this friend at work who has just done amazing things for herself in what seems like a very short time. Granted, she didn't have nearly as far to go as I did/do, but she looks awesome, so I asked her to come to the gym with me and show me a thing or two with the weights. We decided to focus on lower body stuff because... hey... I've always wanted a nice ass. haha. Yesterday and today, I have felt the excruciating pain that comes with trying to keep up with a 24 year old girl. She showed me how to do lunges, squats, and a few other things that will both work my legs out and develop that sweet derriere I've been wanting. Afterwards, though, I could barely walk. It was much the same yesterday, and I still went back to the gym for an upper body workout. Today, I decided to take it easy.
Still not being very adventurous with the food. I did switch over to the Dannon Light & Fit Greek yogurt. It has more protein and tastes way better than the other kind I was eating. Right now, I'm looking forward to May, when I can have a nice, juicy, rare, tiny steak. My love and I have decided we will have it for our anniversary.
Monday, February 2, 2015
Week 10
41 pounds down.
I'll start out by saying that everyone, all along, has been remarking about the differences they see in my appearance. That being said, this past week is the first time that I noticed a difference that I consider meaningful. What? Everyone who's anyone says "It's what YOU think that matters most." Yes... I knew that my arms, legs, and face were getting smaller, but I felt like a bowling ball walking around with toothpicks for arms and legs and a golf ball for a head. This week, that changed... maybe from a bowling ball to a baseball. It was nice to notice, for myself, a change to the section of my body that troubles me the most.
I noticed that the Aveeno lotion makes my hands feel considerably less dry. I've been using a variety of lotions that seem to lose their effectiveness after 10 minutes or so. Last night, I tried the Aveeno for the first time. My hands felt soft and smooth for the rest of the evening. I think I'll get a large bottle of it for use after showers and whatnot. Probably, it seems trivial to talk about dry skin, but that is an anticipated side effect of bariatric surgery... dry skin. I'm just glad I found something that helps.
Still not being very adventurous in the food department. I tend to go with what's going to get me the most protein since that's what I need to focus on. This weekend, I made pasta e fagioli soup for the family. Before adding the pasta, I set aside a bunch for myself. It's got ground beef and beans that will give the protein I need, plus, it's a nice, hearty soup, and there's little I love more than a nice soup in the winter time.
Pretty soon, I'm going to need to go shopping for some clothes. That will be exciting. I keep finding pants in my closet that fit now. Some, I haven't worn for several years. haha. Eventually, though, they'll all need replaced. Plus, I'll need new tops as well. Hopefully, styles haven't changed dramatically. While I'll be a much smaller me, I'll still be proportioned the same, so I'll need to be mindful of a thicker midsection and the perpetual muffin top (until I can afford my tummy tuck). Even at 116 pounds, I was just built this way.
I've been pretty consistent with the exercise plan I committed to. Except today. Today, I woke up at 4:30 with raging cramps. I'm not sure what the issue is, but man... it may be concidence, but weight loss and surgery have seemed to make Aunt Flo a total bitch. I've never had cramps like this before. I ended up taking some midol, which made the cramps go away, but made my stomach hurt a little bit. I forgot they're chock full of caffeine. I fell back to sleep, though, around 7 and slept through my exercise time. Well, I'll have to be kind to myself over that. I've always considered Aunt Flo's arrival a good excuse to take it easy and relax some. There's always tomorrow.
This week, I had a few people tell me that I've inspired them into shooting for better habits food wise and in the way of exercise. That feels good. I love to make a difference.
I'll start out by saying that everyone, all along, has been remarking about the differences they see in my appearance. That being said, this past week is the first time that I noticed a difference that I consider meaningful. What? Everyone who's anyone says "It's what YOU think that matters most." Yes... I knew that my arms, legs, and face were getting smaller, but I felt like a bowling ball walking around with toothpicks for arms and legs and a golf ball for a head. This week, that changed... maybe from a bowling ball to a baseball. It was nice to notice, for myself, a change to the section of my body that troubles me the most.
I noticed that the Aveeno lotion makes my hands feel considerably less dry. I've been using a variety of lotions that seem to lose their effectiveness after 10 minutes or so. Last night, I tried the Aveeno for the first time. My hands felt soft and smooth for the rest of the evening. I think I'll get a large bottle of it for use after showers and whatnot. Probably, it seems trivial to talk about dry skin, but that is an anticipated side effect of bariatric surgery... dry skin. I'm just glad I found something that helps.
Still not being very adventurous in the food department. I tend to go with what's going to get me the most protein since that's what I need to focus on. This weekend, I made pasta e fagioli soup for the family. Before adding the pasta, I set aside a bunch for myself. It's got ground beef and beans that will give the protein I need, plus, it's a nice, hearty soup, and there's little I love more than a nice soup in the winter time.
Pretty soon, I'm going to need to go shopping for some clothes. That will be exciting. I keep finding pants in my closet that fit now. Some, I haven't worn for several years. haha. Eventually, though, they'll all need replaced. Plus, I'll need new tops as well. Hopefully, styles haven't changed dramatically. While I'll be a much smaller me, I'll still be proportioned the same, so I'll need to be mindful of a thicker midsection and the perpetual muffin top (until I can afford my tummy tuck). Even at 116 pounds, I was just built this way.
I've been pretty consistent with the exercise plan I committed to. Except today. Today, I woke up at 4:30 with raging cramps. I'm not sure what the issue is, but man... it may be concidence, but weight loss and surgery have seemed to make Aunt Flo a total bitch. I've never had cramps like this before. I ended up taking some midol, which made the cramps go away, but made my stomach hurt a little bit. I forgot they're chock full of caffeine. I fell back to sleep, though, around 7 and slept through my exercise time. Well, I'll have to be kind to myself over that. I've always considered Aunt Flo's arrival a good excuse to take it easy and relax some. There's always tomorrow.
This week, I had a few people tell me that I've inspired them into shooting for better habits food wise and in the way of exercise. That feels good. I love to make a difference.
Monday, January 26, 2015
Week 9
Yesterday was my 2 month anniversary, and I'm down 38 pounds. It feels like this is going soooo slowly now. I feel like I'm averaging a pound a week, and, I get trapped into that feeling that "I could be doing this without having my innards re-arranged." BUT... I have to remind myself... I'm in this for the long term goal, which is keeping this weight off. Sure, I COULD lose a pound a week in every way I used to do this... The thing is... how long would that last? How long before I put it all back on... and then some? Yes... it was time to get off of the yo-yo plan, and this WILL help me reach that long term goal.
This past Thursday, I went to a support group meeting. It isn't one of the "official" ones through the clinic, but one a friend helped create and invited me to. It was nice to be around some people who are in a similar boat. I think I will enjoy it and look forward to going back. Prior to Thursday, 99% of the people I know who had surgery are pregnant now. haha. That was starting to freak me out a little bit, to be honest. I can think of few things I need less than to end up knocked up right now or any time, for that matter.
I'm sure it's time to kick my workouts up a notch. I'm going to stick with the yoga twice a week, and alternating days at the gym. My goal is to try to work in a weekend gym visit too. Every day, I'll do a some cardio, at least half an hour, on the days I only do half an hour, I'll do some weight training too. On the days I don't do weights, I'll do as much cardio as I can, ideally, building up to an hour. Now to convince myself to get out of bed earlier to make this happen. haha. Maybe I'll reserve the gym for during the week and do yoga on the weekend. I'm just thinking how I'm going to do all these things and end up having it benefit me... I need to find that material they gave us at the exercise class the clinic required. It says what, ideally, should be going on. I'll be glad when I get an elliptical for home. Then I will be able to do that little bit of cardio every day, even on yoga days because, let's be honest, I don't see myself doing yoga then leaving to hit the gym. Gotta keep it real.
It's super nice being able to wear clothes that I wasn't able to before. I think I'm going to have to shop for new ones soon here. That will be fun. I think I'm going to have to start with new bras. For a long time, I ran around in a sports bra because I didn't want to buy bigger ones when I knew I was going to be having surgery. It just seemed wasteful, to me. Now, I'm able to wear my old ones again, but they are getting loose even being hooked on the tightest set of hooks.
I'm still not being super adventurous with the food items... I made some chili this weekend. It wasn't as good as I hoped it would be, but it was good enough. I bought some salami and spread some cream cheese on it and had little rolled up salami snacks. Those were super tasty. Salami has always been a favorite of mine.
I think that's about it for this week. Speed bumps seem to be evening out, and that's making me happy. My energy is getting better, and I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.
This past Thursday, I went to a support group meeting. It isn't one of the "official" ones through the clinic, but one a friend helped create and invited me to. It was nice to be around some people who are in a similar boat. I think I will enjoy it and look forward to going back. Prior to Thursday, 99% of the people I know who had surgery are pregnant now. haha. That was starting to freak me out a little bit, to be honest. I can think of few things I need less than to end up knocked up right now or any time, for that matter.
I'm sure it's time to kick my workouts up a notch. I'm going to stick with the yoga twice a week, and alternating days at the gym. My goal is to try to work in a weekend gym visit too. Every day, I'll do a some cardio, at least half an hour, on the days I only do half an hour, I'll do some weight training too. On the days I don't do weights, I'll do as much cardio as I can, ideally, building up to an hour. Now to convince myself to get out of bed earlier to make this happen. haha. Maybe I'll reserve the gym for during the week and do yoga on the weekend. I'm just thinking how I'm going to do all these things and end up having it benefit me... I need to find that material they gave us at the exercise class the clinic required. It says what, ideally, should be going on. I'll be glad when I get an elliptical for home. Then I will be able to do that little bit of cardio every day, even on yoga days because, let's be honest, I don't see myself doing yoga then leaving to hit the gym. Gotta keep it real.
It's super nice being able to wear clothes that I wasn't able to before. I think I'm going to have to shop for new ones soon here. That will be fun. I think I'm going to have to start with new bras. For a long time, I ran around in a sports bra because I didn't want to buy bigger ones when I knew I was going to be having surgery. It just seemed wasteful, to me. Now, I'm able to wear my old ones again, but they are getting loose even being hooked on the tightest set of hooks.
I'm still not being super adventurous with the food items... I made some chili this weekend. It wasn't as good as I hoped it would be, but it was good enough. I bought some salami and spread some cream cheese on it and had little rolled up salami snacks. Those were super tasty. Salami has always been a favorite of mine.
I think that's about it for this week. Speed bumps seem to be evening out, and that's making me happy. My energy is getting better, and I can't wait to see what tomorrow brings.
Monday, January 19, 2015
Week 8
Down 37 pounds.
Last week, Tuesday, in fact, I decided it was time to head back to an exercise routine. Tuesday, I went to the gym, and I alternated days doing that and a yoga dvd I have. It's felt pretty good to get out there and move. I think it's helping with my energy levels. Truth be told, I'm afraid to trust that, though... you know... the way some people who have been burned one too many times are afraid to trust another potential douchebag. I've tried so many things along the way to try to make myself not only lose weight, but to feel better... less drained... less mentally fogged... Every time I'd try something, it would work for a few glorious weeks or months, and then... it was like the rug got pulled out from under me, and the fatigue and mental fog came swirling back in. I'm maintaining my optimism about it, though. I'm going to keep on keeping on.
I haven't really mixed it up any with the food. I'm kind of sticking with what I know works, for now. I did try a few things that didn't agree with me, like a hamburger patty. That was confusing because I've eaten ground beef in other ways... in chili, taco meat... you know... stuff like that. I really figured I'd be able to handle it. I guess not. Ah well... I'll wait on it a little longer. I'm sure I'll react differently in a few weeks/months.
This week's focus needs to be on slowing down when I eat. I used to be the slowest eater of any group I was in, but now, I'm always the first one done. Sure, that could be because I have far less food on my plate, but I'm thinking I could at least be finishing along with someone who eats faster than I used to. Even that would be okay, I'd think. All the info I have from the clinic, though, says I should be taking half an hour to eat. So, yeah, that will be this week's focus.
It seems to me like bariatric surgery is kind of like the number one rule of Fight Club... and there... I just went and broke the rule. haha. Or.. rather... it's like you aren't supposed to say anything that isn't a glowing review of it for fear of scaring off someone else who may be considering it. Let me be clear...
This was the best decision I ever made, and I am 100% happy with both my progress and my decision. If I had to, I'd do it all again tomorrow.
The thing to remember is this... It's a process; it's a process I am brand new at, and it's a process I am still learning. I know that my real friends LIKE it when I take them on my journeys with me... through the good, the bad, and the ugly. Ultimately, I'm a realist. I WILL paint an accurate picture of this for you. Furthermore, I have a right to reach out to my friends for support and encouragement. It helps me to hear from others who have done this "I experienced that icky feeling, and it passed" or "here's how I coped with this." Apparently, I don't get to be like 99% of my friends who have had this surgery and got zero discomfort afterwards. Certain foods bother me right now. Right now, I have constipation. Before I started exercising again, it was hard to get out of bed in the morning due to extreme energy depletion.
Guess what, though? That stuff passes. Eventually, I'll get to a point where I'm not having any of these problems. And we all have to remember... Well... the ones who carry the same motivations as I do need to remember this, anyhow. I didn't have surgery because I'm afraid of vomiting occasionally (seriously, it's happened twice), constipation, or other temporary discomforts. I did it because I'm afraid of heart disease, diabetes, esophageal cancer that comes with years of GERD (acid reflux), high blood pressure, achy joints, and all the other things associated with carrying around too much weight.
If you make this decision, don't make it because your friend used to be fat and now she's pretty, vivacious, and awesome. She's always been all those things. Do it because it's right for YOU and YOUR health.
That being said... I've lost 37 pounds in two month's time. I talked on the phone with my mom yesterday. In true critical fashion, she asked how much I've lost so far. I told her, and she says, "wow... I'd have thought you'd do better than that." It took me straight back to being 16 years old, introducing her to a boy I liked, and hearing her say "he's cute. What's he like you for?" It feels kind of shitty, but I know, at the end of the day, I've never lost 37 pounds in 2 months before. I know how to keep my sense of perspective. I know I was at the smaller end of the spectrum of people who have bariatric surgery. It comes off of larger people more rapidly. I'm doing what I've been instructed to do, I'm compliant with my program, and I'm happy with my progress... But... god DAMN... why do our mothers have the ability to slice into us that way?
Last week, Tuesday, in fact, I decided it was time to head back to an exercise routine. Tuesday, I went to the gym, and I alternated days doing that and a yoga dvd I have. It's felt pretty good to get out there and move. I think it's helping with my energy levels. Truth be told, I'm afraid to trust that, though... you know... the way some people who have been burned one too many times are afraid to trust another potential douchebag. I've tried so many things along the way to try to make myself not only lose weight, but to feel better... less drained... less mentally fogged... Every time I'd try something, it would work for a few glorious weeks or months, and then... it was like the rug got pulled out from under me, and the fatigue and mental fog came swirling back in. I'm maintaining my optimism about it, though. I'm going to keep on keeping on.
I haven't really mixed it up any with the food. I'm kind of sticking with what I know works, for now. I did try a few things that didn't agree with me, like a hamburger patty. That was confusing because I've eaten ground beef in other ways... in chili, taco meat... you know... stuff like that. I really figured I'd be able to handle it. I guess not. Ah well... I'll wait on it a little longer. I'm sure I'll react differently in a few weeks/months.
This week's focus needs to be on slowing down when I eat. I used to be the slowest eater of any group I was in, but now, I'm always the first one done. Sure, that could be because I have far less food on my plate, but I'm thinking I could at least be finishing along with someone who eats faster than I used to. Even that would be okay, I'd think. All the info I have from the clinic, though, says I should be taking half an hour to eat. So, yeah, that will be this week's focus.
It seems to me like bariatric surgery is kind of like the number one rule of Fight Club... and there... I just went and broke the rule. haha. Or.. rather... it's like you aren't supposed to say anything that isn't a glowing review of it for fear of scaring off someone else who may be considering it. Let me be clear...
This was the best decision I ever made, and I am 100% happy with both my progress and my decision. If I had to, I'd do it all again tomorrow.
The thing to remember is this... It's a process; it's a process I am brand new at, and it's a process I am still learning. I know that my real friends LIKE it when I take them on my journeys with me... through the good, the bad, and the ugly. Ultimately, I'm a realist. I WILL paint an accurate picture of this for you. Furthermore, I have a right to reach out to my friends for support and encouragement. It helps me to hear from others who have done this "I experienced that icky feeling, and it passed" or "here's how I coped with this." Apparently, I don't get to be like 99% of my friends who have had this surgery and got zero discomfort afterwards. Certain foods bother me right now. Right now, I have constipation. Before I started exercising again, it was hard to get out of bed in the morning due to extreme energy depletion.
Guess what, though? That stuff passes. Eventually, I'll get to a point where I'm not having any of these problems. And we all have to remember... Well... the ones who carry the same motivations as I do need to remember this, anyhow. I didn't have surgery because I'm afraid of vomiting occasionally (seriously, it's happened twice), constipation, or other temporary discomforts. I did it because I'm afraid of heart disease, diabetes, esophageal cancer that comes with years of GERD (acid reflux), high blood pressure, achy joints, and all the other things associated with carrying around too much weight.
If you make this decision, don't make it because your friend used to be fat and now she's pretty, vivacious, and awesome. She's always been all those things. Do it because it's right for YOU and YOUR health.
That being said... I've lost 37 pounds in two month's time. I talked on the phone with my mom yesterday. In true critical fashion, she asked how much I've lost so far. I told her, and she says, "wow... I'd have thought you'd do better than that." It took me straight back to being 16 years old, introducing her to a boy I liked, and hearing her say "he's cute. What's he like you for?" It feels kind of shitty, but I know, at the end of the day, I've never lost 37 pounds in 2 months before. I know how to keep my sense of perspective. I know I was at the smaller end of the spectrum of people who have bariatric surgery. It comes off of larger people more rapidly. I'm doing what I've been instructed to do, I'm compliant with my program, and I'm happy with my progress... But... god DAMN... why do our mothers have the ability to slice into us that way?
Monday, January 12, 2015
Week 7
There were highs and lows this week, but I guess that's to be expected. I think I started on a mild depression. I think a lot of that is routine for me, though. I swear I get SADD every winter. I've never been officially diagnosed, but I'm fairly certain I've got at least a mild case of it.
I feel like I've become so routine with foods and whatnot, like I have the same thing day in and day out. On one hand, that's a good thing. On the other hand, it starts to feel like I should be bored. Well... I need to be focused on getting enough protein. Bottom line. I want to be able to build up some muscle and not have my hair start falling out.
Last week was my first full week back to work. I realize now that 90% of my weight issues revolved around my snacking the day away as I sat at my desk. The first few days were hard, once I realized. It seems to have gotten easier, though, to just pick up that water bottle instead of reaching into a bag of chips. Knowledge is power, and as soon as I realized what was going on, it was easy enough to fix. The one craving I can't seem to put away is the craving for a nice, icy-cold glass of Coke. Hopefully, in time, that will fade.
They buy breakfast and lunch for us a lot, here lately, as incentives for working overtime. I've gotten to a place where I'm okay with the fact that I can't eat any of it, but man... so many well meaning people out there want to say those things... "can't you just have a little..." "surely you can just have some of the fruit..." no. no, I can't. I won't starve. I have stuff in my bag that I CAN have.
My incision is nearly healed, though, so that means exercise can start soon. I know that will help me feel better. I'm having a hard time figuring out where to start. I guess I can go back to what I used to do, the gym a few days a week and some yoga at home a couple of days a week. When it's nice out, I fully plan to take advantage of that by being outdoors for walks and hikes as much as possible. I even talked with some friends about biking and kayaking, so there's plenty to look forward to that way.
Last week, I wore these pants I haven't had on in 3 years. It felt nice, but there was that voice in the back of my head reminding me "you bought these as fat clothes 3 and a half years ago." Well... that's fine and dandy... my scale says I now weigh less than my boyfriend does, and that was my first goal, and I've hit it. Who cares if it's just by a pound, for now?
I hate the way I sound all negative about this, but, really... it's a huge adjustment. They're changes that aren't bad at all. Through all this period of adjustment and learning a new way of life, I know this is the best thing I could possibly have done for myself. I know my energy will return, and I know I will get where I need to be.
Oh... hey... did I mention that my blood pressure issue appears to be resolved? How awesome is that?
35 pounds down... and we're chugging along.
I feel like I've become so routine with foods and whatnot, like I have the same thing day in and day out. On one hand, that's a good thing. On the other hand, it starts to feel like I should be bored. Well... I need to be focused on getting enough protein. Bottom line. I want to be able to build up some muscle and not have my hair start falling out.
Last week was my first full week back to work. I realize now that 90% of my weight issues revolved around my snacking the day away as I sat at my desk. The first few days were hard, once I realized. It seems to have gotten easier, though, to just pick up that water bottle instead of reaching into a bag of chips. Knowledge is power, and as soon as I realized what was going on, it was easy enough to fix. The one craving I can't seem to put away is the craving for a nice, icy-cold glass of Coke. Hopefully, in time, that will fade.
They buy breakfast and lunch for us a lot, here lately, as incentives for working overtime. I've gotten to a place where I'm okay with the fact that I can't eat any of it, but man... so many well meaning people out there want to say those things... "can't you just have a little..." "surely you can just have some of the fruit..." no. no, I can't. I won't starve. I have stuff in my bag that I CAN have.
My incision is nearly healed, though, so that means exercise can start soon. I know that will help me feel better. I'm having a hard time figuring out where to start. I guess I can go back to what I used to do, the gym a few days a week and some yoga at home a couple of days a week. When it's nice out, I fully plan to take advantage of that by being outdoors for walks and hikes as much as possible. I even talked with some friends about biking and kayaking, so there's plenty to look forward to that way.
Last week, I wore these pants I haven't had on in 3 years. It felt nice, but there was that voice in the back of my head reminding me "you bought these as fat clothes 3 and a half years ago." Well... that's fine and dandy... my scale says I now weigh less than my boyfriend does, and that was my first goal, and I've hit it. Who cares if it's just by a pound, for now?
I hate the way I sound all negative about this, but, really... it's a huge adjustment. They're changes that aren't bad at all. Through all this period of adjustment and learning a new way of life, I know this is the best thing I could possibly have done for myself. I know my energy will return, and I know I will get where I need to be.
Oh... hey... did I mention that my blood pressure issue appears to be resolved? How awesome is that?
35 pounds down... and we're chugging along.
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